I have been having some panic episodes lately...not extreme but some of those "wake up thinking and contemplating what the heck I just got myself into" kind of episodes. Even though I am a little afraid, I often hear God speak to me in ways that I didn't expect. The other morning, I turned on the TV and my favorite lady, Joyce Meyer was in the middle of her sermon and she quoted my absolute favorite verse, "For God did not give us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of sound mind" After that she just quoted all the verses that deal with fear and I quoted them with her. Another way I heard God speak was through general posts I read on Facebook...a young lady quoted "Where you go, God will be with you there" and "God has an excellent plan and you have to "be still and quiet" to hear it". I know I have lots of humor in my conversations and sometimes a few "choice" words slip out a time or two but I have always remained spiritual and cognizant of my Southern religious roots and right now, I am hanging onto them dearly. Now don't get me wrong, I am very, and continue to be, excited about my upcoming venture, but I am seeing the "realness" of it everyday. To those who are reading this blog, if you are facing a decision that might impact your life, career, relationships etc., I hope that my words can show you that you are not the first nor the last to face this challenge. It has been hard and as "doors begin to close", I have found that it's more of a bittersweet feeling than exhiliration. I think the hardest decisions can be the ones we choose ourselves. They are the ones where you are in a "safe and predictable" place in life but you choose expand yourself because you know it's right. Believe that God doesn't let anything happen that you will not be able to handle. He never promised it would be easy, fun, or any of those things but he promises strength and His grace to follow along our journeys. Maybe I am not writing this to inspire anyone else right now but to inspire me. I need to hear God more than ever these days! Please continue to keep me, my family, and my friends in your thoughts and prayers.
The countdown begins...6 weeks until August!
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Friday, June 1, 2012
Favorite colors
Soooo yesterday I told my homeroom about leaving for Abu Dhabi and today, I decided to tell my first block students. As expected, some of the homeroom kids in my first block blabbed the secret but that made first block students want to know even more. After I showed the powerpoint, one of my "too grown" girls came up to me and asked me what my favorite colors were. I was busily and frantically looking for some documents at the table. In true Ms. Dula form I replied, "Get on away from here...I tell you about that later. I can't do everything all at the same time". For those that may not know my style, you may think that is harsh, but my students have learned my codes very well. She knew I didn't mean anything by it so she smiled and got ready to go back to homeroom. As she walked away, she said, "I'm gonna find out your favorite colors, Ms. Dula".
Fast forward to the afternoon. After a day of, "Be quiet", "I'm gonna write some names down", and "Put your heads down because my patience is gone", I happened to be looking at my desk. On it, amongst documents and to be graded work, I found an oddly shaped, hand made envelope addressed to me. Now, you see, this is not the first letter I have received like this, and most of the time, it is proclaiming some child's innocence after I had falsely accused them of something or a mushy "You're the best teacher in the whole wide world" note..hmmmph. So...I open it up, expecting the usual, except this time it wasn't. In fact, it was one of the sweetest notes I have ever received. I must say that I cringed a little at the capitalization and punctuation (writing teachers do it the best :), but I felt happy and very loved. My favorite line was "Do what your heart tells you to do". I couldn't have said it better. SN: She wrote at the end that she already "knew" what my favorite colors were.
Fast forward to the afternoon. After a day of, "Be quiet", "I'm gonna write some names down", and "Put your heads down because my patience is gone", I happened to be looking at my desk. On it, amongst documents and to be graded work, I found an oddly shaped, hand made envelope addressed to me. Now, you see, this is not the first letter I have received like this, and most of the time, it is proclaiming some child's innocence after I had falsely accused them of something or a mushy "You're the best teacher in the whole wide world" note..hmmmph. So...I open it up, expecting the usual, except this time it wasn't. In fact, it was one of the sweetest notes I have ever received. I must say that I cringed a little at the capitalization and punctuation (writing teachers do it the best :), but I felt happy and very loved. My favorite line was "Do what your heart tells you to do". I couldn't have said it better. SN: She wrote at the end that she already "knew" what my favorite colors were.
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